The Power In Knowing Yourself

The Power In Knowing Yourself

What’s the power in knowing yourself?

This very important question is something that everyone should explore for the power that you hold within and that you gain as you pursue a path of inner growth, which includes knowing yourself.

For today’s #WednesdayWisdom post, I’ve decided to share our topic in audio format:

Podcast Inspiring Human Potential Inner Growth Maria Florio

 

 

 

Click to the Inspiring Human Potential podcast and tune in to how knowing yourself empowers you through awareness and acceptance of yourself allowing you to avoid situations that drain you and that lead to potential regret for decisions made when awareness of one’s self is not present.

Every day you choose to pursue inner growth or not, every day you choose to know yourself a little more, and every day you choose how to pursue self-love so that you may lead a joyous and harmonious life, and in doing so spread that unconditional love to others and the world at large.

Every moment is a choice that you make, I hope you choose love!

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Moving from inner conflict to inner growth

Moving from inner conflict to inner growth

How do you move from inner conflict to inner growth?

I talk a bit about the topic in the Inspiring Human Potential podcast and since it’s #WednesdayWisdom, I thought I’d share our topic of the day in audio format instead:

Inspiring Human Potential podcast - Dealing with Inner Conflict - Moving from inner conflict to inner growth

Click here to tune in and listen to the episode

 

 

 

 

Moving from inner conflict to inner growth is something near and dear to my heart as I write about it and try to share it with others so that everyone who comes across it may transition from a state of unrest/uneasiness to a state of harmony/peace/completeness within themselves.

Going from a mindset that involves inner conflict to one that is set on inner growth is a process that requires awareness of the self and the external; proactiveness in the moment to redirect focus and actions, reactions, etc.; and the desire to inspire your highest potential by allowing self love, acceptance, completion, worth, and so on to rule in your world and in your life…not separation or divide, not fear or disconnectedness, not good or bad…Only Love and Understanding, and a desire to create a happy life and in doing so also contribute to a happy world ❤

I will expand on this in an upcoming blog post, but for now I will let the podcast episode do the rest of the talking 🙂

Here is the link to the podcast on iTunes for iTune users – Inspiring Human Potential podcast on iTunes

The importance of focus and understanding yours at a deeper level

The importance of focus and understanding yours at a deeper level

When it comes to focus there tends to be a challenge for some to maintain it.  While it’s good to be flexible and open to change, focus is what can assist in persevering towards a decided objective.  When you switch from one thought to another in a way that changes the end objective, you may want to stop and reflect on why that is.

 

The reason for questioning your decision to change direction is because you want to find out why you’re going down a different path.  If the reason is long term it’s one thing, but if the decision to change is potentially a lack of confidence that you can obtain your previously decided objective then that’s another story.

 

What you focus on helps you to know the things that are important to you and what you want to invest your time in as you live life.  Whether you’re making life decisions or business ones, redirecting your focus requires thorough thought if you want to understand why you’re refocusing your attention elsewhere and if this refocus is here to stay or not.

 

Some questions that you can ask yourself when you’re getting ready to change focus on something you had decided you wanted to achieve are:

  • What has brought me to decide that I need to change direction?
  • What am I feeling when it comes to what I’m leaving behind? And how do I feel about my new focus?
  • Where do I see my new focus going and how is it going to improve my life?
  • Why is this new focus better than my previous one?
  • Is this the first time I change my focus on this particular situation?
  • How do I know this focus is the one that I’ll go through with?
  • Does my changing focus on this matter indicate something more to me about the matter or myself?

 

Add any other questions that come to mind as you go through this list and as you answer each, tune in to your heart.  Notice what emotions you’re feeling because they hold an even deeper meaning to your answers and can assist you in digging to the bottom of the real reason behind your change in focus.

 

Decisions that you make for the betterment of your life are always important and it’s understanding what that importance is that is key; the same goes for the importance behind your changed focus.  Asking why the change and how you feel about it is very important for you to stick to your new focus.  Also because, if you keep changing focus you’re never going know if that decision could have been achieved had you not switched it.

 

What do you think about focus and switching focus?  How has it affected your life and what have you done to understand your changes in direction, in decisions?

What’s the right solution for your struggles

We all go through struggles in life and this means we also search for solutions to those struggles.  The hard part about finding these solutions is tuning in to your heart and finding your answers from within.  This is difficult because of all the external inputs we get that guide us along the way at the beginning of our contemplative journey as individuals.  So how can you turn a struggle around for you?  How can you find that right solution for you through your heart and using the external inputs to actually help you identify your heart?

It all starts with you wanting to overcome your struggle and looking for solutions.  In the absence of you searching for the right solution there would be no solutions to consider.  So, it is thanks to those struggles that come your way that you are pushed to look at different ways to overcome an uncomfortable situation.

In time, you can tune in to your heart by listening to those solutions that you were told were the right solutions, but that don’t seem to be solving your struggles.  As you follow those solutions there will continue to be unsettling feelings from within and it is these feelings you want to pay attention to so that you can find your solution.

Once you identify the uncomfortable feeling inside of you that takes place every time you take action according to someone else, it is then that you can start contemplating different solutions that you want to test out.  You think of ways to find harmony within and this search is what will reveal your right solution.

The other part of the puzzle is remembering that you can learn from your struggles.  By turning your struggles into opportunities, you transform struggles into things that happen in life, but that you can resolve in time through the love you have for yourself and the heightened awareness you have of those solutions that aren’t working for you.

As you go through these steps you will find that you change your perspective and adopt only solutions that resonate with you from within.  These solutions, the ones that match your heart’s desire, are the right solutions for you.  It is only when you identify these opportunities that you can stop seeing them as a struggle and work with yourself at a deeper level.

How do you feel about struggle?  And what have you done to find your ‘perfect solution’?

Overcoming insecurities and removing external definitions

Typically, we all get defined by our loved ones as we grow up.  You know, those comments that end up defining you as the talker of the family or the neat freak or the nagger, and so on.  While these traits can be a part of who you are, they don’t have to define you in such a way as to make you insecure or self-conscious.  Yet, they do affect each one of us in a way that makes us justify or excuse our behavior in numerous circumstances.  If it only stopped there that would be fine, but these definitions of us also end up affecting what we do or don’t do.

When you’ve been told for most of your life that you’re a certain way (whatever the traits and behaviors you’ve been ascribed) you also think that maybe you can’t do something because of it, and this is where these external definitions stop you from doing something.  But the little component that stops you for good is you, which is why you need to remove these external noises.  The only way you’re going to do this is if you stop thinking these traits are something you need to remove or something that need to be justified.  So, how do you do this?

For starters, recognizing that many of the definitions (vices and virtues) of you come from others.  By others I mean loved ones and guides.  This includes parents (first and foremost), siblings, teachers, friends, and colleagues to name a few.  With this knowledge, you can now move on to recognizing when you’re getting on your own case because of something someone else has told you is a “bad” thing or is something that could be avoided.

We all have had these situations where we stop ourselves or think about something we’re doing in a way where we make an excuse and justify why we’re doing what we’re doing.  It’s in these instances that you should remember that the only reason you’re justifying yourself is because someone has told you that you do this too much or that you should stop doing this because it’s not a good thing.  You become self-conscious and this makes any insecurities you may have regarding yourself that much more present.

This heightened insecurity then brings about a feeling of lack or not good enough or maybe just a tiny doubt about yourself; no matter how big or small, it stops you from being yourself 100%.  You hold back because you have your loved ones’ repetitive voice in your head telling you to get rid of that habit, to stop doing that thing, or just that you’re too much of this or that.

Once you sit down with yourself and ask if you’re ok with being that “too much” or “too little” then it’s up to you to come to your defense the next time your insecurity arises and you hear those voices, those comments, that allow doubt to creep in.  Stop in that moment and remind yourself that you’re ok with that trait, that you accept it and it is others who are different and that this is ok.  It’s ok to be different and at the end of the day, the comments that these loved ones have made are based on their personalities, their perspective, their behaviors.

Another thing you could do in addition to helping yourself overcome these external definitions and stop having them hang over you and keep you from being you is to in turn stop doing this very thing to someone else.  If you define your loved ones or anyone and tell them why they shouldn’t have that trait or that they have too much of that trait, remember how you feel about this exact same situation and keep the comment to yourself.  Instead, be encouraging to them and help them to be themselves 100%, all the way, with no shame and nothing that needs to change.

How have you worked through external definitions of you and in doing so helped to eliminate your insecurities too?

Focusing on being right takes away focus from more important things

In our lives there will be many situations where we will feel wronged or want justice and although this is understandable, focusing on this won’t allow you to see other things that are much more important.  So how can you let go of being right and refocus your attention on what really matters?

The first thing that needs to be brought to your attention in situations like these is the fact that each side thinks they are right.  It’s all about perspective and seeing as people do things as a consequence of what they believe in they will think that they’re right in doing so.  This doesn’t mean someone can’t tell if they’ve done something wrong or not, but the likelihood in those situations where a clash arises is based on the fact that two or more people think one side is in the right and the other isn’t.

This idea of one side versus the other being right is exactly why focus on being right ends up being a waste of time and energy.  If the other side thought they were wrong, you wouldn’t feel wronged because the person or people would have already apologized instead of standing their ground in thinking they’re right.  This cycle is endless and even though some people may say talking helps, this isn’t always the case.

Add to the situation the component of anger and frustration, and you have a mix of emotions that keeps growing every day more.  The more you think about what has happened and not getting an apology or admission of guilt, the more you get upset at the entire situation.  This is where your focus on being right totally messes with you.

It’s not about you being right or wrong that is the issue, it’s about you not being able to go beyond this situation without an apology or justice being served.  It’s about thinking of all the ways you are right and how the other person should see it so clearly that you wonder how is it even possible that they don’t see it.  Again, all throughout this process the only certain thing is your feelings of injustice at the entire scenario.  This focus takes away from what you could be learning about what just happened and how you could learn something about yourself if only you stopped thinking so much about the other side (and how wrong they are).

If you find yourself in this situation the best thing to do is to remember that if an apology isn’t given it means the person or people don’t think they’ve done anything wrong.  At this point the questions you should be asking are why are you so upset and what can you do to change how you feel about this without needing the other people involved to do something about it.

Since perspective is what the clash is all about, try to take a step back and look at what is really bothering you about this.  Can you tell if there’s any judgement on your end or expectation that influences what you’re thinking and how you’re reacting?  If so, isn’t your judgement and expectation just as influential to this whole thing as the other person’s or people’s judgement and expectation?

Try to see what it is you can takeaway from this experience instead of doing everything you can to try and convince someone else that they have to admit they’re wrong when they don’t think they are.  Then look to what you can do to avoid these types of situations.  Also, if these people have specific characteristics about them or a way of doing things that don’t resonate with you, remove them from your circle of friends and avoid having people like this in your life.

Do remember that overall in life each person is just trying to make it and maybe what they did wasn’t meant to affect anyone.  They can’t help being who they are and doing things in the way they see things.  We’re each limited in our view, seeing as we can only see so far; and this seeing is based on our life experiences and our thought processes, values and beliefs.

How do you refocus from being right or wanting justice to the bigger picture, to the meaning and lessons of a situation that arises where you feel wronged?

Everyone can make a mistake, it’s owning up to it that makes a difference

No matter how big or small a mistake can be, when you are able to own up to it, it makes a world of difference to you and/or to the other who suffered from the mistake.  It’s not about focusing on the blame or the now, ‘past’ event (and what was done); but rather accepting that it happened and exploring what exactly happened and why.

Obviously, the situation in exploring a mistake and owning up to it differs when it’s you who made the mistake or someone else who made it.  Let’s take a look at the two separately to see exactly how owning up to a mistake makes a difference in each circumstance.

Let’s start with you owning up to a mistake because it is simpler and easier for you to manage that situation in a way that you can learn from and avoid sitting on it or hiding inside and in doing so leaving hurt and disappointment within instead of releasing it and moving past the situation.

Because we’re human, it is only normal to err, and we know when we’ve done so because inside of us there’s this uneasy feeling.  The feeling could be anger or a lingering sadness, or maybe that feeling you get in the pit of your stomach that you did something wrong.  There’s the tendency to initially blame everyone and everything else or to make excuses for ourselves on why we had to do what we did.  Usually the knowledge and awareness that you made the mistake wants to hide beneath the surface and so everything else is to blame as to why that mistake happened.

Putting aside your ego is never easy, and since life is full of external events that are out of our control it’s easy to find something or someone else to be the cause of a choice.  However, the choice is made by you and you alone, and pointing the finger at someone or something else won’t make you feel better.  Unconsciously you’ll know.  So, instead of doing this to yourself, accepting and acknowledging that you made a mistake can help.

First recognize ego, recognize the part you played and did have control over, and recognize that at the end of the day you made the final choice.  Unless, your life was on the line, you made a conscious and thought out decision.  With all of this in the forefront then remind yourself that you’re human and explore the situation to see what you can learn about yourself from your mistake and from what happened so that you can try to avoid it the next time around.

For our second scenario, when someone else makes a mistake and doesn’t own up to it, the situation is much more challenging.  It’s challenging because there’s another person with their own personality and thought process in front of you, and with their own ego and perspective.  You can argue with them all day and try to make your points on why they should admit their mistake.  None of this will get them to do so if they don’t acknowledge it themselves.  The best you can do in these cases is to accept and move on.  If this person makes mistakes repeatedly and they affect you and your life in a big way, then remove them (if you can) from your circle of people.

Mistakes are made and mistakes are things we can learn from always if only we look beyond the surface; if only you don’t stop at the mistake and point the finger.  We’re all just trying to make it a good and happy life, along that road…mistakes can happen, but you can move past them and have them add to your person and world if you focus on the good that comes out of the situation.

How do you handle mistakes and owning up to them or dealing with people who don’t own up to theirs?