Dealing with the unforeseen and unexpected events of life

Unforeseen events are a part of life.  Some people have an easy time dealing with them, while others have a tough time with them, and then there are others who fall in between, who are trying to make it easier for themselves to handle the unexpected.

The primary challenge with anything unexpected is precisely that, the unforeseeable part.  Even if you remove expectations from your mindset, the number of different scenarios that can play out in a specific situation or in dealing with a person are endless.  It isn’t that we can’t predict or read situations or people, but what can happen in life, the circumstances that can take place, are limitless.

The component that causes a reaction in these unforeseen situations is surprise.

The best comparison that comes to mind is a surprise birthday party or someone who walks into a room and you don’t hear them, and when they approach you, you’re startled.

No matter how well you try to prepare for what life throws your way, a curve ball will always come your way, and that initial reaction can include perplexity, anger, disappointment, sadness, and other similar emotions to a surprise or startled body-mind reaction.  Whether the emotion is nice or not so nice depends on the situation and on us as individuals.

At the end of the day our perception and how we want to live our life can bring us to leave things as they are or try to transform situations so that they lead to growth or so that the impact is not in the negative.

For those who have an easier time dealing with the unexpected, they have already chosen to be proactive and positive in life.  They want for themselves to face life head on, with love and stamina in their heart.  For those who have a harder time, it comes down to two choices, accepting life as is and being fine with their thought process and ways or (2nd choice) trying to transform their reaction by taking the opportunity to attempt a different reaction each time they are faced with the unexpected.  The in between people are already working at transformation, and each person has their own way to try and transform their internal reactions to the unexpected so that they may use what just happened in a productive and positive way for themselves and in their life.

Personally, I’ve found helpful to ponder why I’m reacting a certain way to the unforeseen event.  I also ask myself what’s the problem, what am I holding on to and/or what am I judging, and how can I make what just happened ok to me.  I also look at how I can grow from the situation and persevere on my chosen path.

At first this was not something easy at all.  It was very hard not to be angry when someone used me or tricked me or when the plans I had made got ruined because of something I could not change (did not have any control over).  As I slowly took the time to remove myself from each of these situations, calm myself, and look for the lesson I could learn, for what I could take away to grow internally and to change my feelings with these types of situations, it got easier and easier to reduce the time of the “negative” reaction and instead put myself in a position where I immediately look for my growth opportunity in the challenge I’m being faced with through what just happened.

Hopefully sharing this exercise can help you through your unexpected events; but also…

I would love to hear about how you react to disruption, the unexpected?  Also, what do you do when disruption happens? What do you think about unforeseen circumstances? And are you looking to transform how your initial reaction?

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