There are always so many topics I’d like to write about at once, there’s always so much to share and talk about when it comes to the human condition. Today’s topic of choice is making your own decisions, and accepting the consequences of those decisions. I want to stress the choice of word “own” next to decisions because that’s quite an intricate topic if you ask me, and when associated with something that’s put into practice, like a decision, it becomes even more multifaceted.
Although the word (own) seems pretty straight forward, when you look beneath the layers of human behavior someone can say it, but not put it into practice. Let me expand on this.
Most of us, if not all of us, will say and believe that we have made those decisions on our own, through our own thinking and possibly our gut feeling. For starters, since the day any of us are born we are raised by individuals who teach us thought process, who teach us ownership, who teach us about our societal structure and teach us how to become part of that structure. Until a certain age, we might not even question what we think, it is just something we do. Slowly, we learn about consequences and decision making. Now, let’s put it in the context of the topic at hand (because essentially, this analysis alone could go on forever).
The portion of those individuals that say this and talk about the events that come from their decisions (the consequences) in a positive or proactive way are the ones who did make those decisions on their own. On their own, meaning they really felt in tune with the decision, since they’re not expressing regret or complaints about the events that followed.
On the other hand, those individuals who always seem to have something to complain about with what comes following their decisions or who always express regret for the consequences might want to take a second look at the idea that they think they’re making their own decisions.
If you really believe in something, you typically feel in tune with it and what follows. Even if it brings about a mistake, believing in your choice will drive you to continue pursuing it, to find ways to get around the problem, not stop at the first obstacle. It’s innate for humans to go after the things that feel right or good. It’s innate for humans to move away from the opposite.
So, if a person is consistently making decision after decision, without being happy about the outcome, then the decision is most likely not their own from within, but rather their “own” from without. From without meaning that possibly someone they admire or something they read indicated to them that this was the decision to make or possibly it’s what they believe is the way (the right decision) since it’s all they know.
Essentially, unhappiness with the consequences of decisions give us the opportunity to explore ourselves from within and really find out what is our own decision.
How do you recognize true ownership of decisions?