Inner Growth Word of The Day 90 – Sad

March 31

Inner Growth Word of the Day: Sad

 

Dictionary.com definition: (adj.) 1. affected by unhappiness or grief; sorrowful or mournful.  2. expressive of or characterized by sorrow.  3. causing sorrow.

 

Sad in a sentence: Even though there is a grouping of things that are considered sad, two people don’t necessarily see the same event or situation as sad.

 

Sad in action: Something is sad when a person defines it as causing unhappiness or sorrow.

 

Sad and inner growth: If something is sad you have the chance to dive into that something and understand if you’re defining it as sad because you feel sadness or if it’s because others have defined this something as sad.  There can be a distinction between what you feel and what you’re dealing with as actually being sad.  Uncovering that this something doesn’t make you sad leads to inner growth as you get the opportunity to change your definition of this something into what you’re actually feeling.

 

Sad and inner growth action steps:

  1. In-depth self-exploration questions: What do I think makes something sad? How do I feel about those things others say are sad?  Is there anything others find sad (life circumstances or situations) that I don’t relate to and that don’t cause sadness within me?  Do I think the attribution of sad is never changing?  What lessons have I learned from sad things, events, and situations?

 

  1. List or word bubble: Make a list or word bubble with sad at the center and then list or put around it all the words that come to mind associated with it. With that list of words now write next to each word something that is sad to you and comes to mind when reading that word.  From this list go through the sad items you listed and ask yourself if you really feel sadness or if maybe you just put them in there as sad because that’s what you’ve been taught.

 

  1. Bring your awareness to your feelings about sad things or situations and focus on one thought that comes to mind at a time. For each thought (event or circumstance) ask yourself if you are really saddened by it or if you are feeling these feelings because this event or circumstance has been something others have told you is sad.  If your answer is that it does cause you sadness, then move forward with allowing that thought flow along with the feelings associated to it.  Give each thought that comes to mind at least five minutes of your time.  The time lapse will help with focus and allowing you to feel the feelings instead of jumping to another feeling right away.

 

Your turn – Share your sad sentence, life examples, and inner growth action steps; and let me know if you’d like to see something added to our Inner Growth Word of The Day explorations 🙂

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Inner Growth Word of The Day 89 – Silence

March 30

Inner Growth Word of the Day: Silence

 

Merriam-Webster Dictionary definition: (n.) 1. forbearance from speech or noise.  2. absence of sound or noise.

 

Silence in a sentence: Some people love silence, others can get somewhat uneasy if that silence lasts too long.

 

Silence in action: When all you hear is nothing but the wind, silence is what surrounds you.

 

Silence and inner growth: Silence can help inner growth as it is a moment where everything is quiet.  This absence of noise gives you the opportunity to have some time with your thoughts and yourself.  It is in moments like these that you can explore things that have happened to you, feelings that you’re feeling, even the feelings that arise from being surrounded by silence.  Contemplation always leads to a next step, and then another, and another.  These silent moments give you plenty to reflect upon and the necessary time to decide on the actions you’ll take next.

 

Silence and inner growth action steps:

  1. In-depth self-exploration questions: What does silence mean to me? How do I use silence to understand myself better?  When does silence occur in my life?  How have my silent moments affected my life?  What life lessons have I gained from silence?  How do I feel about silence and what about when I’m surrounded by it?  Does silence generate peaceful feelings within me or unrestful ones?

 

  1. List or word bubble: Make a list or word bubble with silence at the center and then list or put around it all the words that come to mind associated with it. Next list three to five life events that have happened to you and that brought about complete silence for an hour or more.  Next to the three to five life events place one of the words from your first list.  Now out of those three to five words, with the word you placed next to it from your first list, expand on the event.  Put as many details in it as you want and make sure to use the word you chose from your first list in your story.

 

  1. Bring your awareness to your feelings about silence and at first focus solely on that initial feeling. If questions or thoughts come to mind, push them aside for at least five minutes.  When you’re ready allow those additional questions and thoughts to come to mind and notice the feelings they arise within you; allowing each feeling to fully express itself as you do this.  Write down anything that stands out and do the same thing with it.

 

Your turn – Share your silence sentence, life examples, and inner growth action steps; and let me know if you’d like to see something added to our Inner Growth Word of The Day explorations 🙂

 

Avoiding confusion or misunderstandings when communicating

Everyone has an opinion, a perspective, a way they think and see things.  This point of view is the starting point of our thoughts and reasoning, which also means it’s the way we absorb information shared with us.  So, when listening to others, this means you could be listening with a tainted ear, one that listens with your own perspective in mind.  I say could because there is a choice you can make once you realize you’re listening with your own thought process and perspective, and not a neutral ear that listens (purely) to what the person is saying.  Before getting into the ‘how’ you could attempt truly listening to someone, let’s finish expanding on the tainted listening first and why it’s such an important topic to consider or at least be aware of for yourself and others.

I’d like to start with you.  How many times have you shared something (a story or experience) with someone, but no matter how or what you said you didn’t feel like you were being understood?  I want to venture a guess that this has happened to everyone at least once in their lifetime, if not more.  The reason you didn’t feel understood is probably because the person listening was either not really listening or they were, but with their perspective.  Those individuals that you do feel understood by on the other hand have your same perspective or have gone through a similar situation and therefore they can empathize with you.  The same thing can happen to someone who is sharing with you and doesn’t feel understood.  Listening from your perspective is an issue as it blinds you, at least partially, from what you’re being told by the other person.  This is why people also find themselves blindsided at times in situations where a person they think they knew, acted differently than what they thought they would.

If you look at someone or something in front of you with a filter, you are not able to see what’s in front of you, nor are you listening to what is actually being said.  If on the other hand, you’re able to become aware of your perspective and put it aside, you can tune in to what the other person is expressing (whether through actions or words).  At first it might be hard to see how you’re influencing a conversation, but if you become aware of your perspective in the act of conversation or observation you can start putting your filter aside and really tune in to the person in front of you.  This helps you to understand what they’re trying to tell you, as well as see who they are and not who you want them to be or think they should be.

In the end, dealing with other people involves two perspectives.  Even if your perspectives may be similar there’s always something they could experience differently from you and the same goes for you with them.  It is only through seeing that extra layer, your perspective, that you can remove your filter and see clearly.

How has perspective influenced your understanding of what someone tells you and vice versa?

Inner Growth Word of The Day 88 – Upset

March 29

Inner Growth Word of the Day: Upset

 

Merriam-Webster Dictionary definition: (adj.) 1. emotionally disturbed or agitated.

 

Upset in a sentence: The types of situations or behaviors that can upset people, do so in different ways.

 

Upset in action: When you are emotionally shaken by something that is considered being upset.

 

Upset and inner growth: Becoming aware about the things that upset you allows you to explore each of those things from the inside-out, meaning you look within to understand why you get upset.  This brings about inner growth from a self-awareness standpoint, as well as giving you the possibility to take action to change patterns you’re not necessarily happy about.

 

Upset and inner growth action steps:

  1. In-depth self-exploration questions: How does getting upset affect me? Why do I get upset?  What have I learned from getting upset?  How has getting upset affected my relationships?  What impact has being upset about something had in my life?  Do I get upset often?  Is there something I would change about me and why or when I get upset?

 

  1. List or word bubble: Make a list or word bubble with upset at the center and then list or put around it all the words that come to mind associated with it. From that list pick five words that stand out the most for you emotionally.  Expand on each in how they relate to being upset and what feelings they bring about in you.

 

  1. Bring your awareness to your feelings about getting upset and as you allow that first emotion to flow, also keep in mind the first thought that came to mind as you focused on the initial feeling. Give yourself some time to allow both thought and feeling to occupy your body and mind fully.  Any other thoughts or feelings that arise, postpone for at least five minutes as your next feeling and thought to explore.

 

Your turn – Share your upset sentence, life examples, and inner growth action steps; and let me know if you’d like to see something added to our Inner Growth Word of The Day explorations 🙂

Inner Growth Word of The Day 87 – Let go of

March 28

Inner Growth Word of the Day: Let go of

 

Merriam-Webster Dictionary definition: to stop holding or gripping (something or someone). – often used figuratively: You need to let go of the past.

 

Let go of in a sentence: When you let go of something or someone, it isn’t always easy.

 

Let go of in action: Releasing your hold on something or someone physically is an act that you take, but when this release is figurative it involves emotions and thought.  In either case, you let go of that something or someone.

 

Let go of and inner growth: When you let go of something or someone it’s typically preceded by a situation or event that brings about the need to let go of that something or someone.  When we’re talking about ‘letting go of’ in a figurative sense your emotions are involved; this is where inner growth comes into play.  Contemplating letting go of and the feelings that arise in making that decision bring you to take a look inside and understand your reasons for letting go of, as well as exploring the challenges you may face in having to let go of something or someone.

 

Let go of and inner growth action steps:

  1. In-depth self-exploration questions: Is it easy for me to let go of something or someone? What does letting go mean to me?  How has learning to let go of something or someone affected my life?  How has it affected me and those around me?  What are some of the life lessons I’ve acquired due to having to let go of something or someone?  How do I feel about letting go of something or someone?

 

  1. List or word bubble: Make a list or word bubble with let go of at the center and then list or put around it all the words that come to mind associated with it. Next to each word listed place the first thing that comes to mind, something or someone you’ve let go of.  From the list pick one to three words with your let go of event and expand on each.  Write about your feelings during the event, your thoughts and self-discoveries, as well as the biggest life lesson you gained from the experience.

 

  1. Bring your awareness to your feelings about figuratively having to let go of something or someone. Allow that feeling to flow, but silence the thoughts for a couple minutes.  When you’re ready let your thoughts come in too; pay attention to the first ones that come to mind.  Allow those to express themselves individually and make note of what stands out in how you feel about each one.

 

Your turn – Share your let go of sentence, life examples, and inner growth action steps; and let me know if you’d like to see something added to our Inner Growth Word of The Day explorations 🙂

Inner Growth Word of The Day 86 – Hold on

March 27

Inner Growth Word of the Day: Hold on

 

Merriam-Webster Dictionary definition: (v.) 1 a. to maintain a condition or position.  1 b. to maintain a grasp on something.

 

Hold on in a sentence: People hold on to things as long as they do not wish to let go, it is a choice that can change at any time.

 

Hold on in action: Keeping a condition exactly the same throughout time is to hold on to that condition; but wanting to keep that condition exactly the same when changes are on the horizon is also to hold on to.

 

Hold on and inner growth: When you hold on to something or someone, especially if transformation is taking place, there is a lot that you learn about yourself (like things you don’t want to let go of, why you want to keep them the way they are, what this wanting to keep or not let go of means when it comes to fears or challenges, etc.).  Through the learning process inner growth happens as you release what you want to hold on to when the circumstances around you show you a different direction or outcome.

 

Hold on and inner growth action steps:

  1. In-depth self-exploration questions: What does it mean to me to hold on to something or someone? How has holding on affected my life?  Why do I hold on to things, people or situations?  What actions do I take when I want to hold on to something or someone?  How do I feel when holding on isn’t an option anymore?  What have I done when I couldn’t hold on to something anymore?  What have I learned from holding on?

 

  1. List or word bubble: Make a list or word bubble with hold on at the center and then list or put around it all the words that come to mind associated with it. Pick five words and list next to each of them one thing you hold on to and one thing you used to hold on to.  From those five words expand on at least one of them and write out what happened, as well as what you learned about yourself through that experience and ‘hold on’ exploration.

 

  1. Bring your awareness to your feelings when you hold on allowing the very first feeling to be the one to express itself. If other feelings start coming into the mix, refocus your attention on the one initial feeling.  Do this for a couple minutes or until you really feel that first feeling.  Once you’re ready, explore another one of the feelings that was coming by as you started thinking about holding on.  Do this for as long as you want and when you’re ready to let your thoughts come into the mix too, to see what feelings those ‘hold on’ situations bring about, you can do that and see where it takes you.

 

Your turn – Share your hold on sentence, life examples, and inner growth action steps; and let me know if you’d like to see something added to our Inner Growth Word of The Day explorations 🙂

Inner Growth Word of The Day 85 – Value

March 26

Inner Growth Word of the Day: Value

 

Google’s Dictionary/Search definition: (n.) 1. the regard that something is held to deserve; the importance, worth, or usefulness of something.  2. a person’s principles or standards of behavior; one’s judgment of what is important in life.

 

Value in a sentence: Something or someone can be of value to one person, but not to another.

 

Value in action: When something or someone is worthy, it is of value.

 

Value and inner growth: Finding out why you value some things or people and the value you attribute to each gives you insight into what you find important and worthy.  This also leads you to explore what you find of less value.  Both can further inner growth by bringing about questions and reevaluations of that which you attribute value to.

 

Value and inner growth action steps:

  1. In-depth self-exploration questions: What does value mean to me? How has value affected my life?  How do I attribute value?  Has anyone influenced my definition of value?  Why do I value some things more than others?  How do I attribute value to people?  How has my application of value affected my relationships?

 

  1. List or word bubble: Make a list or word bubble with value at the center and then list or put around it all the words that come to mind associated with it. For each word you listed put the thing or person it reminds you of that has value for you.  When you’re done pick three or more of the word combinations and next to each place the exact opposite and something that doesn’t have value for you.  Now expand on each word combo and list the reasons why they have or don’t have value to you.

 

  1. Bring your awareness to your feelings about value and notice where you feel it first (maybe near your heart or your stomach area). Tune out your thoughts and just focus on feeling the feeling you’re getting all throughout your body.  After about five minutes allow your thoughts to flow or think of the words you put in your list (one at a time) and allow the feelings of those things to expand throughout you.  Does any one feeling standout more than the other?

 

Your turn – Share your value sentence, life examples, and inner growth action steps; and let me know if you’d like to see something added to our Inner Growth Word of The Day explorations 🙂